Although I will take the blame, I want to make it clear that the devil plays a huge part in our broken hearts.
I’m going to start by saying that we have free will, yes, that’s a fact. My actions and words have caused me pain. I could have chosen not to do what I did, and say what I said. But, the devil is the one who puts evil thoughts in my head. Telling me that I am not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, worthy enough.
I could be this confident, strong woman, but it seems that every time I feel like I am sturdy, I get kicked with these thoughts that no matter what I do, that I will never be what is wanted.
I’ve lost friends and loves over the fact that sometimes, I don’t feel like I deserve them. Why do I, deserve to be loved? I am constantly told that I am just ugly. Stupid. Unwanted. These thoughts poison our minds, and they don’t just come from thin air. They are leaked into our minds by the person who wants us to fail; the devil. My heart isn’t broken from being rejected from other people. It is broken because I have been rejecting myself.
When you don’t feel good enough, you end up cutting people out of your life. I know this, and it is the reason why my heart is shattered.
What we need to know is that every time you feel like the thoughts running around your head are tearing you down, all we need to do is let God absorb these negative vices and let him fill our mind with love. Hope. Dreams.
I am working towards fixing my heart. I know I can’t do this alone. I need to let God in, and he will pick it up piece by piece, and restore my heart. Of course, you may have memories that leave scars. But once you let Him in, you will have all you need.
He constantly reminds us that we are beautiful. We are good enough. We are wanted. We are worthy.